Domestic Violence and Indelity: Who is to Blame?

In the often dramatic theater of separations, stories of pain, betrayal, and, too often, violence intertwine. But when the stage is dominated by aggression, who really has to bear the responsibility for the marriage breakdown? In cases of domestic violence and indelity, who is to blame?

The Legal Perspective: Violence vs. Indelity

The Court of Appeal of Bari has provided a clear and strong ruling: domestic violence cannot be overshadowed by other marital faults. In a recent case, a woman, previously condemned for indelity, was able to restore her dignity and role as a mother after proving she was a victim of abuse. This verdict highlights the complexity of family dynamics, where appearances can be misleading and the truth often remains hidden behind silences and fears.

Infidelity and Marital Responsibility

When a spouse violates marital duties, the judge may assign them “fault” in the separation or divorce process. Fault is attributed when one party’s actions have made cohabitation intolerable, leading to the dissolution of the marriage. The legal consequences of being deemed at fault include:

• Losing the right to request spousal support.
• Losing inheritance rights in the event of the ex-spouse’s death (although a nalized divorce automatically terminates inheritance rights).

However, for fault to be established, the unlawful behavior must have been the primary cause of the marital crisis. If other signicant issues existed beforehand, they must be considered in determining responsibility. For instance:

• If a husband abandons his wife and she subsequently engages in an extramarital aair, the husband may still bear the primary blame.
• If a wife commits indelity rst and the husband later follows suit, the wife remains the primary party at fault.
• If a couple had already agreed to separate, any later indelity is not grounds for assigning fault.

Can Domestic Violence Justify Indelity?

A victim of domestic violence, whether physical or emotional, may seek solace in another relationship without losing spousal support rights. While indelity constitutes a breach of marital duty, it is legally justied if it occurs as a response to abuse. Conversely, if a husband becomes violent after discovering his wife’s indelity, the wife may bear the blame for the marriage breakdown, but she retains the right to report him for domestic abuse.

Revisiting a Separation Ruling

In a landmark case (Court of Appeal of Bari, Ruling No. 1493 of 2025), a woman was initially charged with separation due to indelity. However, upon appeal, it was revealed that she had been a victim of domestic violence, and the charge was revoked. The court ruled in her favor, ensuring her minor child remained in her custody.

The defense successfully argued that the rst-instance ruling had overemphasized circumstantial evidence, such as WhatsApp conversations, phone calls, and photographs, while overlooking the severity of domestic violence. The court ultimately determined that:

• The woman’s extramarital relationship occurred after she had suered abuse.
• Indelity, though morally and legally signicant, does not equate to the severity of physical and psychological violence.
• Criminal proceedings for domestic violence played a decisive role in overturning the initial ruling.

This judgment represents a critical step in protecting victims of domestic violence. It rearms that violence carries more legal weight than indelity when determining fault in a separation. Furthermore, it highlights the importance of prioritizing the well-being of children in violent family environments.

Key Legal Takeaways:

• Inheritance and Estate Rights: Under Italian inheritance law, a spouse who is deemed at fault in a separation may lose rights to their partner’s estate. However, if the spouse has suered domestic abuse, they may still have legal claims under Italian succession law and Italian estate planning regulations.
• Inheritance Tax and Estate Sales: If a U.S. citizen is inheriting property in Italy, they should consider Italian estate tax implications, particularly in cases involving disputed inheritances due to separation or domestic violence.
• Selling Inherited Property: If a surviving spouse inherits a property post-separation, they must navigate legal complexities in selling inherited property in Italy, especially if disputes over fault impact property rights.

Real-World Examples:

Example 1: A woman endures years of physical and psychological abuse. She later nds comfort in an extramarital relationship. If separation occurs, the court will prioritize the history of violence over her indelity.

Example 2: A man is abusive. His wife, out of fear, seeks protection from law enforcement and later develops a relationship with an ocer. In a separation case, her relationship with the ocer will not be equated with the abuse suered. The husband will be deemed responsible for the marriage breakdown.

Example 3: A separation case presents chats, messages, and photos proving indelity. However, further evidence of domestic violence emerges. The judge must give greater legal weight to the violence rather than the indelity.

This ruling underscores the evolving approach of Italian family law in recognizing the signicance of domestic violence and ensuring that victims receive the protection they deserve.

VGS Family Lawyers is a law rm that specializes in family law matters such as inheritance, separation and divorce, child custody, and more.

In case you need assistance, please write to: info@vgslawyers.com.